Anger is an emotion that everyone has experienced. Be it when your sister broke your laptop. Or when your boss took credits for a presentation you’d worked day and night for. And most of us have had this embarrassing moment where we spoke a lot of vicious truths and opinions in a moment of extreme anger. The very truths that we were supposing to go the grave with us. And this must have been, presumably, followed by a long lecture about how anger is the vehicle of the devil and how one should never get angry. But we all know that sometimes it’s impossible to not get angry. So, let me get straight to the point and tell you what you should do when you’re angry.
Look Again: Look again at the anger-provoking situation from the perspective of others. Put yourselves in the shoes of different people (especially the person you’re most angry at) and think about what made them act like they did. After all, everyone has their own reasons and justifications. If you cannot figure it out yourself, talk to them and ask them. If you’re able to understand the person’s motives, it would be easier to accept their shortcomings. It might, in fact, turn out that it would be difficult to remain angry after this heart-to-heart.
Cut the importance of the situation: This one might be a bit difficult, but it is a game changer. Your friend spilled coffee on your phone. Or your breakfast toast is not roasted to perfection. Or you’re late for an appointment because the taxi driver was slow. So what? Think about it. Ten (or fifteen) years down the line, you might not even remember it. (If it’s a case of spilled coffee, you might not even remember it the next week). And who knows, it might even lead to something good. For example, that late appointment might result in you being fired from a job you already had been yearning to leave.
Fantasize about taking revenge: Please note, the keyword here is ‘fantasize’. Dream about getting even, plan about the best way to slow roast your boss over a bonfire, rant about it to a (trusted) friend, but don’t act on it. In this way, you get rid of your all your anger, but you don’t have to face heart-wrenching consequences for it.
As Jim Butcher says,
“Anger is anger. It isn’t good. It isn’t bad. What you do with it is what matters. It’s like anything else. You can use it to build or to destroy. You have to make the choice.”
So, make the best of the situation. Also, you might want to use all that excess energy to swim across the English Channel.